We three kings (and a little princess)

I alluded, in the last post, to an event in which I'd be taking the kids around the neighborhood (not murdering them). This was the "Star Singing", in which local kids, under the aegis of the Catholic Church, ring each doorbell and offer a blessing for the new year. Peter, with friends Julian and Luis, covered our street this year - by my estimate, over 200 doorbells were pushed. They were accompanied on one day by honorary princess Anke. I'm especially proud that we visited almost all the apartment buildings - the little old ladies were so happy to see the kids, even though they often stumbled over lines (you can see Luis/Melchior below, posing with the cheat-sheet), and only once could be convinced to earn the title "Star Singers". When the blessing was complete, one of the kids would write on the house (in chalk; all the houses are stone here): 20 + C*M*B + 09. I used to think the initials were for Caspar, Melichior and Balthazhar, the 3 kings, but I have learned it means Christus Mansionem Benedictat, or Christ Bless this House. The numbers, the year. On the local houses you could see years' worth of childish scribblings next to the door.

People really got into it. Several people asked especially when we'd be stopping by so they could be there. Some people going on vacation left an envelope with the neighbors. The only (moderately) unfriendly people we encountered were some self-avowed Protestants who just wanted to through a little money in and have the kids go away. Many more said "We're Protestant but we always love this!".

We went out on two afternoons, Jan 3 and 4th, in bitter cold, and quit shortly before finishing up the entire street because it was threatening to snow (eventually paralyzing the lower Rhine with 5 inches of powder).

People were throwing in bills left and right. One little girl emptied her piggybank.

They collected almost 500 Euros. And about 10 pounds of treats, "to reward these sweet little boys". That was collected by the church and sent on to orphans in Romania (I'm not kidding about that!). The money when to African missions. The boys, despite the frozen noses and stingy-with-the-treats chaperone (me), all signed up for next year.

Bringing the kids around

Very funny faux pas today:

I called the neighbors regarding an upcoming event with the kids (more on it later), in which I will be accompanying the kids around the neighborhood. So I called the neighbor and wanted to say 'We'll talk later about when I will bring the kids around the neighborhood'.

Bring: bringen
around: um

Stefan knows where this is going.

So, the phrase 'Bring the children around the neighborhood' was translated by me as 'Die kinder um den Nachbarschaft umbringen'.

The only problem? 'umbringen' means 'to kill (a person)'. So I inadvertantly threatened the lives of the neighbors kids on their answering machine (i.e. to kill the kids in the vicinity of the neighborhood).

Luckily Guido, their dad, knows his sons and the exasperating effect they can have on adults well, and thought the whole thing was pretty funny.

*sigh*

Happy New Year

Germans go around this time of year wishing each other 'Einen Guten Rutsch', which means 'A good slide'; most folks around here think it is a nice folksy way to wish each other a nice slide into the new year. But I've read it comes from Yiddish - from the Rosh in Roshhashana, or the Jewish new year.

To prep for new years Germans spend inordinate amounts of money on fireworks. They may only be purchsed 3 days before New Year's, and then only shot off immediately after midnight. This means the skies over the town are full of backyard displays for at least an hour tonight. Also means that tomorrow everyone has to go into the yard and find the debris. The smell of sulfur can linger until morning, if the evening is still.

Another German New Year's tradition is a skit called 'Dinner for One'. Oddly, this show, from 1963, was recorded in Germany, but in its original English. All evening, you can see it, or one of the many recreations in high German, Swiss German, or any dialect.

Tonight newly 5 year old Anke and her older brother will join us in the street to look at the crazy neighbors' fireworks display. Anke still believes the fireworks are especially for her birthday. Peter lets her believe this.

Anke Engleke

Anke Engleke is my favorite figure on German television at the moment. When our little Anke was born, everyone in Germany said 'Oh yeah - Danke, Anke' - a catch phrase made popular by her which had gone through a 'yeah, that's the ticket' kind of phase. Therefore I wasn't really disposed to like her, even if she does do the German voice of Marge Simpson.

Since last week, though, I'm a fan. Like in the U.S., German TV is rife with reality shows - Super Nanny, Wife Swap, etc, all have German equivalents. A few I've only seen on German TV - Raus von den Schulden (Out of Debt) and Wohnen nach Wunsch (Living as Wished). But like in all these shows, some expert descends on some helpless family and reforms them.

Well, Ms. Engelke's show last week did a send up on these - all the experts paid visits, one after the other, to Josef and Maria von Nazareth - in their stable. First came the debt advisor, who didn't see them getting clear (and who wondered why the baby Jesus didn't look like his dad), then the Super Nanny, who told Josef he had anger control issues (and who wondered why the baby didn't look like his dad), then the kitschy redecorator, who renovated their stable and turned their donkey into a throw rug (and who wondered why the baby didn't look like his dad). At the end, Josef, crazed, slams the door on the next visitors - the 3 wise men bearing gifts.

You couldn't do that on network TV in the US.

Weird German

Typical Friday night - 'studying' German while watching mediocre American made-for-TV movies translated into German (although this one, oddly, was made in Germany in English). I always notice odd things in German when I'm half-learning like this - a few of my current ponderables:

German has a lot of similarities to English - prepositions, for example, that can only be used in certain ways - ponder the difference between 'throw out', 'throw in' and 'throw up'. The prepositions in German are similar enough to English to cause a lot of confusion - for example, in Germany, your house is 'in a street', but you walk 'on the street' - exactly switched from English.

Sometimes I try to learn word roots and build from there. This doesn't always work:

• 'Verwalt' means administration, 'Gewalt' means violence, 'Anwalt' is a lawyer. What's a 'Walt', I must ask, and just how do those three words relate?
• 'Gift' in German means 'poison'.
• 'Mist', instead of being a nice light fog, means 'manure'.

Oh well, back to work.

It's christmasing a lot...

Someone commented to me on the last trip home, "German Christmas is a smaller celebration than in the U.S., isn't it?). Actually, I like to point out that at least one poet verbed the word "Christmas" (Es weihnachtet sehr; hence the title of this piece), which I feel shows how seriously this time of year is taken in Germany!

Maybe the celebration on Dec. 25 is a bit more relaxed than in the U.S. (at least comparing my family to the husband's). But Germans start the party in late November, really, with the opening of the Christmas Markets in the downtowns of almost every city. Some are quite famous - Nüremburg, for example, and I met a couple on the plane recently who were coming to German just to make a Christmas-market visiting cruise on the Rhine! At the Christmas markets, items ranging from traditional wooden toys to nativity sets to handcrafts are for sale, as well as numerous stands selling all kinds of food.

Then, of course, there is the Glühwein (mulled wine - click for recipe). This is ubiquitous in the markets, with stands selling the warm drink in ceramic mugs (deposit required) and drunk at the beer-garden type tables surrounding the stand. Really, there's nothing like this - the warm alcohol and spices hitting your tummy while you stand in the cold evening air...

Follow it with some candied roasted almonds or roasted chestnuts (heretofore just known to me through Christmas songs) and you're set for the evening.

Now, nestled in among all the Christmas-market visits, is the Feast of St. Nicholas. The original saint's feast day, with its tradition of gift giving, was apparently mixed up with Christmas some time ago, and thus in the U.S. we have Santa Claus. But tonight St. Nick will be visiting us and filling the stockings with a few goodies and small toys.

Finally comes Christmas. Not content at this point with a single day, Germans instead start the celebrating seriously on Christmas eve; this is when most folks attend church (although the tradition of midnight mass was lost through curfews during the occupation after the war; "Midnight" is now at about 10pm). Also, at least around here, presents are opened Christmas Eve (the Christmas Man or Christ Child, depending on your religion (Cath/Prot), apparently arrives while you're at church).

The next day, the First Day of Christmas, is spent doing all same type of Christmas activities Americans would recognize - visiting, playing, feasting, singing "Oh Tannenbaum"... The feasting is mostly confined to sweets, though; meals tend to be relaxed affairs on this day. Then comes the Second Day of Christmas - a repeat of the first day! And the bonus is, since it's weighted pretty much as importantly as the first day, that you can spread your visits out over the two days, and no one feels miffed you weren't there on "the" day.

Then you have a few days to recuperate before New Years. You need it.

The Triple Crown

Forgot to post - P. successfully achieved his Yellow-White belt at Judo the other day. For those not in the know, these days they have added intermediate belts for the junior judo circuit, so the wee ones needn't wait years between levels. Unfortunately, P. didn't place in the intra-club tournament that had, but he was awarded an honorary 3rd place medal as solace.

St. Martin's Day

These past weeks have been a flurry of activity to prepare for the annual St. Martin's celebrations. These are a big deal for the little kids, who spend hours preparing paper lanterns (with varying degrees of help from the mothers). The children will meet after dark (i.e. 4:45pm at this time of year) for a procession through the village. In the olden days these lanterns would be lit by candles; but as every adult can remember the heartbreak of a friend's lantern engulfed in flames, everyone uses specially purchased battery powered lantern rod & light combinations.

After the parade, in which the children sing the traditional St. Martin's songs about his generous exploits to the accompaniment of a small marching band, there is a bonfire. St. Martin, who's been shadowing the parade the whole time on this horse, comes to the front and re-enacts the famous St. Martin-and-the-Beggar story (see picture). Then he hands out to all the children a kind of slightly sweet pastry in the shape of a man carrying a clay pipe, called a Weckmann. I've read this is supposed to represent Martin, who was a bishop, and the clay pipe is an inverted Bishop's crook.

After this activity (which is usually accompanied by Glühwein, or mulled wine, for the grown ups), the kids go door to door with their lanterns, singing for the homeowners and collecting candy. This has been going on for generations though, so unlike a lot of things here the Germans can't blame an American cultural trait (here: Halloween). And I must say: the kids' haul was much bigger, for less "work", than in the U.S.!

St. Martin is apparently a popular saint throughout Europe. It's always pointed out that the festival is a good chance to teach the kids the power of sharing, but splitting of a cloak in half to share with someone who has NOTHING seems a rather shaky platform on which to build an entire festival! I'm also not sure what the significance of the lanterns is; probably descended from some pagan ritual.

In my more cynical moments I wonder: If Valentine's Day is a "Hallmark Holiday", and Christmas is encouraged by the toy and luxury good industry, then is St. Martin's Day pushed by the paper products industry? Somebody has to buy all that construction and transparent paper!

But it's still really cool.

Interesting note: at 11:11 a.m., on Nov. 11 (11/11), Karneval season officially opens. New royalty is named, and slowly, very slowly, Karneval activities begin, like Sitzungen (literally: A Seating), which is sort of a series of corny stand-up comedy acts in a beer-hall type setting.

Picturs of the lanterns to follow.

Peter can drive a pen.

Well, the boy passed trial number 2 this week, successfully obtaining his Fountain Pen Driver's License. His teacher felt his chicken scratching was real handwriting. How am I supposed to know - I can't read this (*&$%@($ "simplified" handwriting the kids have to learn. In my defense, other parents I talk to (including my German teacher) can barely decipher it either.

P. insists on having the License with him in class, to prove to the other children that he is worthy. Although, he did point out the down side - now he MUST use the fountain pen, whereas before he might choose his implement.

Now onto trial number 3: Judo.

Ein Hattrick.

Big week for Peter.

Monday we met his swimming teacher for a swimming test. He passed and is now the proud owner of a 'Seepferdchen' - or little sea horse - certification. Thursday at swim class he will get his patch, which I, or someone who actually knows the sharp end of a needle from the dull, will sew onto his swim trunks. To achieve this he had to jump into the water, swim the pool end to end, and back (25 meters each way), and dive down to retrieve a ring.

I believe the certification is called little sea horse because of the way Peter swam - only a little offset from vertical, with his feet doing little else than providing a little upward force. Reminded me, in fact, of a sea horse's style. His arms did all the work. But he never gave up, and even did an extra set of laps just to show off (ok, maybe because his teacher told him to).

The next test of the week was to get his 'Füllerführerschein' - or fountain pen driver's license - in school. The German schools still encourage the use of fountain pens because it's believed that it encourages the children to be more careful in writing. Indeed, his handwriting with the fountain pen is better than with a pencil, but he always has blue splotches on his hands as a result. He has a special 'beginner' fountain pen, suitably colorful. After weeks of agonizing, Peter finally finished up the last few sentences of the text he was supposed to copy 'error free'. This means only that he had to catch and correct all his errors before the teacher did.

Friday: We'll see if he manages to go from his White belt in Judo to his White-Gold belt. Nowadays they have intermediate steps for the little ones so they don't have to wait years between promotions. Wouldn't it be nice if real life was like that?

Btw: The title's not a typo; it's Denglish for Hat Trick.